This morning at 5:45 am I woke to the sound of someone knocking at the door. It was that "vaudeville," punch line knock. My only thought was, "Oh, isn't that funny. It's the crack of dawn, please leave me alone." But then, I heard the delicate ring of the bell that's tied to my front door. Hardly any sound at all, but I recognized that brassy ting.
Growing up, the daughter of a divorced mother with two children, we always had a bell hanging from our front door. A bell hanging from the door knob was like trip wire, a signal, a gentle sounding of the alarm. When I heard this sound this morning, I was sure that an intruder had cracked the cypher of the front door and was inside the chamber. I grabbed the heavy, palm-size rock under my pillow (yes, I sleep with a stone in my bed) and stormed through the living room, then into the kitchen. No one there but an old, headless dress form named Esmeralda. I took the false alarm as a message from beyond, put the pen to the moleskine and let the pen move. The message is below.
--The Gilded Butterfly
This is Oran, your brother and your kin.
You are whole. You are complete. You are one with all life. You are one w/ the Universe; and made of the same material. You are as close to God as you are to your own breath. You ARE God. Not A god. But part of the whole. The system. God. Part of the intricate pattern. We become separate. Disparate. We develop rituals and rules. But this is not God. Human inventions to prove that "I was here!" "This is my legacy, this language, this temple, this dance." Temples crumble. Language gets lost in a forgetful mouth. But, if you can remember to breathe, you remember your "place" in the great cosmic story. The story of oneness. It is told in one, calm breath.
Blessings, Your Brother,